


Being Human

by schmulte



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: A little bit of angst, Alternate Universe - Being Human (UK) Fusion, Background Jily, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, M/M, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Modern AU, Non-Graphic Sexual Content, Slow Burn, author should not have been given use of tags, no beta we die like men, this is gonna be dumb and bad, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-16
Updated: 2020-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:15:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28106121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/schmulte/pseuds/schmulte
Summary: Sirius is a vampire. Remus is a werewolf. After meeting one fateful night, they decide to move in together and try and live normal "human lives." What could go wrong?
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Kudos: 17





	1. Bad Moon Rising

**Sirius**

Everyone dies. Everyone deserves a death. Some of us are meant to die of old age, in our beds, holding the hands of our loved ones. Some of us are meant to die too early. Others, too late. 

Sirius Black was supposed to go down in a blaze of glory. A soldier's death, defending his country. Not cold and alone and scared shitless. Death was always a certainty, his last defiant act against his family, something we all see coming. But not for Sirius Black.

For a vampire, death isn't the end, but the beginning.

For Sirius Black, that meant waking up on the battlefield, cold and dirty and surrounded by dead bodies, the stench hanging low in the air. For Sirius Black, that meant touching his fingers to the side of his neck and feeling two small, almost insignificant puncture marks. For Sirius Black, that meant his worst nightmare had come true- the thing that shaped him, was behind every decision he ever made. He had become the very thing he had been calling his family since he was old enough to think. He had become a monster. 

He had James, at least. Brave, arrogant, _stupid_ James, who had walked right alongside his best friend, even in death. 

They had stayed together, over the years. They had hundreds of adventures, traveling the world. Sirius's favorite time was the 60s. It had taken him decades of teasing to finally give up the Beatles haircut. They separated sometime in the 2000s. James wanted to go home, see what became of his parents, if his family home was taken care of. Sirius understood. James had invited him, of course. The Potters were like family to Sirius. But this felt like something James needed to do on his own. 

A could decades later, they reunited in Bristol, sitting in a dingy diner eating chips. It's Sirius's favorite diner because it's where he met Remus. 

"I'm sorry, you're doing what?" James asked. He was bug-eyed, staring at Sirius as if he were some sort of ghost. Which he supposed he was, in a sense. Sirius just shrugged and rests his arm on the top of the booth behind him. 

"I'm getting a flat. You're not the only one with money, mate."

"But with a _werewolf_?"

"Keep your fucking voice down, will you?" Sirius said, glancing quickly around the diner to make sure no one heard.

"Sorry, sorry. But still, mate...are you sure this is what you want to do? They're kind of our mortal enemies."

Sirius just shrugs.

"You know I've never been one for tradition."

James narrowed his eyes and lowered his voice. "I just don't want you to get hurt."

"Jesus, Prongs," Sirius laughed. "I think I can take him. The guy's a bloody stick."

"You know that's not what I mean."

Sirius went quiet. He felt the tell-tale heat of his cheeks going red. You'd think that would stop, when you die. It's quite an annoying inconvenience. 

"We're friends, that's all," he replied after a while. "I know he won't be interested in someone like me."

James just patted his hand sympathetically. Dating as a vampire is hard. Even if he had a crush on Remus, which he _didn't_ , he'd never have pursued it. Remus deserved a partner for life, someone he could grow old with. And that someone just wasn't Sirius. 

This is how Sirius finds himself now, rushing to the door to pay the pizza delivery man before Lily can talk his ear off. She's had him at the door for nearly ten minutes now, making excited small talk. The poor kid looks somehow terrified and bored at the same time. Sirius makes sure to tip extra well. 

"That's enough of that, Evans, let's let the kid get back to his job." He grabs a hold of her arm and gives her a warning smile. 

"Oh, alright," she says, and the delivery boy's shoulders relax with relief. "It was nice chatting with you! Do come again soon!"

The delivery boy practically runs back to his car. Lily's smiling as she lets Sirius pull her over to the living room, pizza in tow. Honestly, Sirius doesn't know how she can stay so cheerful so much of the time. If he was in her shoes, he'd be angry every day of his life.

"He could see me!" she exclaims. Sirius wonders how her face hasn't split in two. Still, he's happy for her, and he says through a mouthful of pizza:

"He could so see you."

He throws himself down next to Remus on the couch, hands over the pizza box. Remus is nursing a headache, he can tell by the way he's rubbing the crease on his forehead. 

"It's happening all the time now," Lily continues, "and not just with people like you, but with, well. You know. Normal people." She says the last part delicately, and Sirius grins. "Anyway, who wants tea?"

Remus groans. It makes Sirius's grin grow wider around his slice of pizza.

"Something wrong with tea, Moony?" Sirius teases. Remus is normally easy to play with, always has a button to be pushed, but he's especially sensitive around the full moon. Sirius loves to just sit back and watch the disaster.

"You keep making tea!" Remus finally groans. "Every surface is covered with mugs and mugs of tea and coffee. I can't even make myself some tea because there's no mugs, there's no tea, it's all been made! And you can't even drink it! I love you, Lily, truly I do, but it's driving me insane."

Lily, unbothered, just shrugs and smiles. "Oh, well, I like my routine. It makes me feel normal."

Sirius is trying really hard no to laugh as Remus's face turns red and he starts stammering. "You're a ghost!"

"Oh, come off it, Moony," Sirius intervenes. "Come on, we've got to go anyway."

"Oh," Lily's smile drops a little as the two boys shove pizza in their mouths and start to collect their keys. "You two are off then?"

"Yeah, we've got work, and then it's Moony's time of the month."

"Oh, okay. Well. Have a good shift, and good luck, Remus. I'll have my first aid kit ready in the morning."

Remus seems to have calmed down a bit and gives her a weak smile. "Thanks, Lily."

Sirius kisses her cheek and throws an arm around Remus's shoulder. Platonically, of course. 

"See you later, Evans. Try not to die of boredom while we're gone!"

The two of them drive to Saint Mungos together. Remus is still a bit sour, and Sirius rolls his eyes and elbows his ribs in the locker room.

"You should be pleased for her," he scolds. "She can be seen by other people see her now. She can leave the house."

"Other people move in somewhere, they get mold or termites," Remus mumbles, mostly to himself. Sirius catches his gaze lingering as he takes off his shirt. "No, we get a ghost."

"And a cat."

"Yeah, great, one more thing that hates werewolves."

"Stop being such a downer, Moons. You know you love Lily."

Remus sighs and pulls his scrubs on over his head. "Yeah, yeah I do. I'll apologize to her in the morning, when I'm less...moony."

"Right. What's the plan, then?"

"I'll work for an hour, then say say there's a family emergency and lock myself in the isolation room before the full moon comes up."

"Brilliant. I'll come let you out in the morning."

They hug, and if Sirius lingers a moment, it's definitely not because he can smell this morning's Earl Grey in Remus's hair. 

There's something else in the air, though. Something inhuman. Sirius follows it after he parts ways with Remus. It gets stronger as he heads towards Intensive Care, and he recognizes it for what it is. He opens the door to the last room on the floor, where he finds an older man in bed with a coma, and a woman looming over him who jumps.

"Jesus, Sirius," she exclaims. "you've got to stop sneaking up on people like that."

"Marlene," Sirius sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. "What the fuck are you doing here?"

She flashes him a wicked grin. "Just getting a snack. Care to share?"

Sirius's eye twitches. Marlene is being risky, as usual, and at his place of work no less. He could throttle her if he wasn't on the job.

"No. I'm clean, you know that."

"Yeah, yeah, I know." She picks up the patient's chart and scans it over. "A positive, huh? Guess he'll have to do."

"Move away from the bed, McKinnon."

"Oh, come _on_ , Black," she laughs. "as if you haven't had your fair share over the years. I seem to recall lots of stories of yours and James's conquests." She's getting up in his space now, smiling that cruel smile. "You can't fight it, Sirius. It's who we are."

"I said, leave him alone. The hospital's out of bounds, Marls."

She relents, finally, gives him a bit of an eye roll and a kiss on the cheek and sways her hips as he leaves. He tries to ignore the sound of the patient's heartbeat.

He looks at the time and makes his way back upstairs, following Remus's scent. He's talking with one of the younger nurses. A pretty one. She's making doe-eyes at Remus and he's smiling politely back, and Sirius has to bite his lip as he throws a hand on Remus's shoulder.

"Shouldn't you be going, mate?" he asks, casually. Remus's eyes widen and he glances down at his watch.

"Shit- I've um. I've got to go, it was nice talking with you, erm..."

"Lucy," the pretty nurse supplements, and Sirius wonders how her blood tastes.

"Lucy," Remus nods. "Right, um, I'll be going then. I'll see you later, Sirius?"

"Five a.m. sharp." he winks. 

He doesn't know how, but he ends up having his coffee break with Lucy, the pretty nurse. He tries to keep a pleasant, non-threatening smile on his face, but he can hear the blood pumping through her veins. He's trying to pay attention to what she's saying, and though he hates to admit it, Marlene got to him, and his anger towards her is not helping his cravings. He'd kill someone for a cigarette right now.

"Sirius?" Lucy is asking. He has to blink to bring her back into focus, ignore her heartbeat pounding in his ears. "Are you okay? You're shaking."

"Oh," he glances down at the coffee cup in his tremoring hand. "Fine. Quit smoking a few weeks ago, that's all."

"Oh, okay. Um. I've been meaning to ask, your friend Remus. Is he single?"

Sirius's smile has bordered on threatening now, and before he knows it he's lying through his teeth. "No. He's not."

"Oh. Well, alright--"

Just then he sees Remus skidding to a halt at the cafeteria door, looking even more panicked than usual. He's got his bag in his hand and he's _not in the isolation room._

"Shit," Sirius mutters under his breath. "Um, I've got to go, lovely chat." And then he's speed-walking over to Remus, grabbing his arm and walking without a word. 

"There's people in the isolation room," Remus whispers hurriedly to him. "I've got about 40 minutes before I change."

"Okay, okay, let's go." He can hear Remus's heart beating in his ear and it's erratic, going faster than he thought was possible. Before he knows it, they're in the car speeding down the street, and Remus is urging him "here's fine, here's fine" as they drive past a wooded area.

"I can't pull over here, Remus!"

Remus tries to get the door open while Sirius is still driving, and he swears and pulls into the grass. He follows Remus out of the car, matching his speed.

"You can't just transform in a random bit of countryside, you could kill someone," he pleads with him. "Just come back to the house, you can transform in the basement."

Remus looks at him like he just suggested flying to Las Vegas and eloping. "I'm not doing this in the house!"

"You can't always keep it separate, Remus, you're going to have to accept that this is a part of you." Remus is running at full pace now, disappearing into the forest, and Sirius is losing him. "Moony! Moony! Shit."

He gets back in the car, nervously taps on the steering wheel. _Bad Moon Rising_ is playing on the radio. It almost makes him laugh. 

A couple minutes go by, and just as he's about to turn the key in the ignition, Remus is running back to the car, opening the door, and throwing himself in the passenger's seat. He's breathless and Sirius can smell the adrenaline. They don't have much time left.

"You're right, let's go back to the house," he breathes. Sirius is staring. "Padfoot!"

"Right, right, sorry--"

They speed back to the house, and Sirius is certain he's broken at least ten traffic laws by the time they get there. He locks the door behind them and starts clearing furniture out of the living room. Lily peeks over from the kitchen, where she's making tea.

"What happened? I thought it was your time of the month, Remus."

"It is, he's transforming here. Help me get the curtains close."

Lily starts helping without another word, running around and getting all the fragile items out of the way. 

"Okay, okay, um, take everything you don't want broken up to your room," Remus says, looking very much like he's trying not to freak out and failing miserably. "Lily, put on some music, really loud, and then you and Sirius need to go."

"What?" Lily asks. "No way, I'm staying with you."

"Absolutely not!"

"Moony, she's right," Sirius interjects over the music. "You need someone to watch you, make sure you don't hurt yourself."

Remus mutters to himself and tugs on his hair for a bit before nodding. "Fine. Fine, but stay in the kitchen. Keep out of its line of sight, if the wolf sees you I don't know what it will do."

Sirius scrambles to get the last of the potential debris out the way, grabs his record player, gives Remus a quick hug and Lily a kiss on the cheek before he leaves. He can hear Remus screaming over the music on his way out. He hopes it's just his enhanced hearing. He sits on the doorstep, shaking and panting, and clutches the record player to his chest. He thinks he can hear Lily crying, now. He doesn't blame her.

The next moment she's there, sitting on the doorstep next to him, the cat in her arms. Her eyes are watery and wide. She looks shaken. The poor cat looks traumatized. 

"He's gone," he hears her whisper. "Whatever that thing is, it's not Remus."

Sirius wraps an arm around her and pulls her in. She rests his head on his shoulder, and he pretends not to hear her quiet sobs and the distinct, unmistakable growling of the wolf.


	2. Son of Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He should be dead within thirty seconds of the transformation. The werewolf heart is about 2/3 the size of a human's. But in order to shrink, it has to stop. In other words, Remus has a heart attack every full moon. All the wolf's internal organs are smaller, so while he's having his heart attack, he's having liver and kidney failure too. And if he stops screaming, it's not because the pain has dulled. It's because his throat and vocal cords are tearing apart and reforming into the wolf's. He literally can't make a sound. By then, his body should be flooded with endorphins to ease the pain, but that has shut down as well. Anyone else would have died of shock long ago. But it won't let him. The wolf drags him through the fire and keeps him alive and conscious so he can endure every. Single. Second. 

**Remus**

Remus comes back into his body a little after dawn. His bones ache and his head is pounding, and for a moment he forgets where he is. He forgets finding the isolation room occupied, being renovated by construction workers for new offices. He forgets running through the forest, tripping over families in tents and lovers hoping for a quiet sneak into the woods. He forgets the look on Sirius's face when he tells him to get out of the house. 

He blinks his eyes open in the sunlight, body shivering on the cold wood floors of the flat. All of the furniture has been moved out of the way, the curtains drawn, and the record player is missing. There's fresh cuts today, long claw marks along his ribs. He must have hurt himself while transforming, the claws coming out before the rest of him has had the chance. His memories are always foggy after the full moon, but the pain, it seems, he can never forget.

He should be dead within thirty seconds of the transformation. The werewolf heart is about 2/3 the size of a human's. But in order to shrink, it has to stop. In other words, Remus has a heart attack every full moon. All the wolf's internal organs are smaller, so while he's having his heart attack, he's having liver and kidney failure too. And if he stops screaming, it's not because the pain has dulled. It's because his throat and vocal cords are tearing apart and reforming into the wolf's. He literally can't make a sound. By then, his body should be flooded with endorphins to ease the pain, but that has shut down as well. Anyone else would have died of shock long ago. But it won't let him. The wolf drags him through the fire and keeps him alive and conscious so he can endure every. Single. Second. 

He doesn't think he can move. The wolf hates a change in routine. He's sure he was a nightmare last night, and groans to himself when he thinks about what Lily and Sirius must have seen or heard. His neck cracks when he hears the door open, the telltale sound of Lily's quiet footsteps. He can smell the Earl Grey tea in her hand and manages a small smile. Lily is nothing if not consistent. 

He feels her before he sees her- setting a blanket over top of him, sitting down on the floor and hugging her knees to her chest. She sets the mug down in front of him and the steam wafts pleasantly in front of his face. 

"Hi," she says, quietly. No matter how softly she speaks, the sound still rings in his ears, makes his head pound.

"Time is it?" he manages to croak out. Lily shifts next to him, he assumes checking the clock. 

"A little after five. I thought you might like something hot when you woke up."

He reaches out blindly and manages to pull himself up just enough to bring the mug to his lips. It's warm and sweet and even though he's still annoyed with Lily's constant tea-making, he does appreciate it. He sits up, wraps the blanket around himself for modesty's sake. Lily looks tired. He didn't even know it was possible for ghosts to get tired. 

"How bad was last night?" 

Lily bites her lip and looks around, as if looking for someone else to answer. She adjusts herself again, rests her chin on her knees. 

"Not bad. We need to get a new couch, though."

Remus winces. "Sorry." 

"It's alright, really. Sirius is a bit grouchy, but he'll get over it."

"He didn't stay, did he?"

"No, no," she rests looks at him apprehensively. She swallows. "We sat on the doorstep, most of the night. Sirius wouldn't go any further." Her eyes start to fill with tears and Remus braces himself. She's going to scream at him, call him a monster, demand he get out of her house. Honestly, he's surprised he's made it this long. He'll miss her and Sirius, but he'll manage on his own. He's done it before.

"I'm so sorry, Remus," she says wetly. "I promised I'd stay with you and I just. I just couldn't. Seeing you in so much pain...I couldn't handle it. I was a coward."

Remus sighs. Of course Lily, sweet, perfect Lily, would apologize to _him_ after he probably traumatized her for life last night. He should never have expected anything less from her. He was stupid to doubt her for even a minute. 

"Lily, no. Please don't cry." He takes her hand no matter how much it hurts to move and lowers his head to meet her eyes. "You are the bravest person I've ever met."

She sniffs. "Really?"

"Really. And I'm sorry for how I treated you yesterday. You must think I'm a right git."

"Well you are, but that's besides the point," she nudges him with her elbow and he tries to hide his grimace. "Seriously, though, you were right. I'm dead. I need to accept that and. Move on." She dries her eyes quickly and flashes a confident smile. Always the positive one, Lily. "Anyway. You're freezing. Drink your tea, and I'll draw you a nice warm bath, hm?"

"Lily, you don't have to go to all this trouble, really. I've been doing this for a long time."

Lily shifted uncomfortably. Remus knew what she wanted to ask, and he tried to communicate to her that it was okay to ask by patting the hand resting in his own. 

"How...how did it happen?"

"It was two years ago," Remus sighs. He tries not to shudder, for Lily's sake. "I was on a camping trip in Scotland. I've never been able to sleep well. I thought maybe a walk by the ravine would help. But then, this...this _thing_ came out of nowhere. I don't think it meant to hurt me- it was chasing something, I think, and it just went to push me out of the way, and..."

He pulls the blanket off his left shoulder. He's barely looked at the scars in years. They've faded to silver lines, now, but he can still remember how they looked when they were fresh. Red, angry claw marks. They used to make him nauseous just looking at them.

Lily doesn't say anything. She just ghosts her fingertips over the lines with a sad look in her eyes. Remus hates it when she's sad. A world without a happy Lily is like a world without the sun. 

"Go back to sleep, Lily. I'll be fine, really."

Lily sighs. "Alright. Your bed is all made up, and there's some fresh clothes out for you. You haven't got any scratches, have you?"

"No," Remus lies. He draws the blanket a little tighter around himself so she won't see. He doesn't want to add to her worries. 

She presses a kiss to his cheek before going upstairs to her room. Remus follows once he know's her door is shut. Sirius's room is dead quiet, which he expected. Waking up Sirius before noon is a death wish. He tiptoes past as quietly as he can, and curses under his breath when the floorboard creaks beneath his feet.

"Moony?"

Remus curses under his breath and slowly turns around, making sure to wrap the blanket around his more...sensitive areas. He can feel the blush creeping up his cheeks as Sirius eyes him and licks his bottom lip. Even disheveled and sleep-deprived he looks handsome as ever, black hair tangled in a mess of curls and five o'clock shadow lining his jaw. 

"Have you seen Evans?" Sirius continues. Remus can feel himself squirming under his intense eye contact. "She was really freaking out, last night."

"Yeah," he clears his throat. "Yeah, I saw her. She's fine." 

Sirius nods and shifts his weight from foot to foot. Remus hopes his blush isn't too obvious. 

"Right. Well, I'm going back to bed."

"Yeah. Me too."

"Great. Um. See you later, Moony." 

"See you later."

Remus hopes Sirius can't hear him calling himself an idiot under his breath. 

After patching himself up, he goes to work as if nothing happened. He tries not to think about how Sirius looked this morning, eyes puffy, his pyjama pants hanging low on his waist. Tries not to think about the way he licked his lips when he saw Remus without proper clothing. That could have meant lots of things, couldn't it? Maybe he just needed some chapstick. The crush is stupid, he knows. Sirius is a vampire. Remus is a werewolf. It just wouldn't work out. At least, that's what he tells himself. 

The next full moon, when he wakes up naked on the forest floor, he realizes he misses Lily and her tea. Perhaps it would be easier to transform at home. He wouldn't have to wait around for Sirius to come pick him up. He wouldn't have to awkwardly find his extra clothes the next morning while avoiding hikers. He could even have a proper shower first. But he also doesn't want to put Lily or Sirius through that kind of experience again. It's as much their home as his, they shouldn't have to leave just because Remus doesn't like the forest. 

He's pulling on his trousers when a twig snaps behind him. 

"Took you long enough, Sirius," he jokes as he turns around. "You'd think a 117 year old would be more punctual--"

But it's not Sirius. Standing there, with a cruel smile, is a man Remus has never seen before. He's dressed in shabby clothing and there's dirt caked in his hair. 

"Hello, Remus," the man says. Remus's eyes widen and he backs up slowly, as if cornered by some kind of animal.

"How- how do you know my name--"

"Relax, Remus. You don't need to be afraid. You see, I know what you are."

Remus finds himself backed into a tree, tries not to grimace as the bark hits his tired bones. The man is approaching him slowly, and Remus feels distinctly like prey in this moment. He looks around wildly for some kind of exit, hoping Sirius will get there soon. 

"And what- what's that?"

"A werewolf," the man says casually. You'd think from his tone he says things like that every day. 

"Sorry, I'm actually Welsh," Remus says. The man doesn't seem to think his joke is funny. Sirius is always telling him his smart mouth is going to get him killed one day. Remus doesn't want to think about the "I-told-you-so" he'd get at his funeral. 

"It's no use lying to me, Remus. You're a werewolf."

"Why- why would you say something like that?"

The man stops in front of him, grin widening. Remus thinks he can see his life flash before his eyes. 

"Because I'm one too."


	3. Finnegan's Wake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At the end of the night, Sirius has to practically carry him back to the flat. Lily thinks he looks ridiculous, still covered in glitter and singing a song about a man named Tim Finnegan, who fell off a ladder and broke his skull. Lily thinks it's a bit morbid to have such a happy tune carry such graphic details. It's undeniable that James Potter has made a complete, utter fool out of himself tonight. Lily gives him a kiss on the cheek anyway.
> 
> Chapter takes place between the first chapter and the end of the second.

**Lily**

Lily Evans thinks she's going insane. One day she was a pretty graduate student, living a normal, average life in her flat with her chubby orange cat. The next, she's a ghost living with a werewolf and a vampire. Really, this isn't where she thought her life- or, afterlife - would go at all. 

She loves Sirius and Remus, she really does. But they can be crap company, especially when they have normal things to do like going to work or having tea with the neighbors. Lily can leave the house, now that people can see her, but what's the point if she doesn't have company? It's not as if she can make any normal, human friends. How would she explain to them that she never changes her clothes, or eats, or drinks?

They've tried to set her up with other ghosts, in the past. Kindred spirits, Sirius had called them. They were nice enough, but Lily didn't really feel anything much for them. It felt odd. Forced. 

She's at home when there's a knock on the door. Sirius is up in his room and Remus is working, and really, it gives Lily so much pleasure just to be able to talk to people that she jumps up right away. Waiting on the step is a young man, around her age, with untidy dark hair, glasses, and a mischievous grin that matches Sirius's exactly. He's quite handsome, actually, and she thinks it's cute when he sees her and immediately straightens up. 

"Jesus, Mary and Joseph," he mutters. "you must be an angel. Did I die and go to heaven?"

Lily rolls her eyes and leans against the doorframe, arms folded across her chest. "Can I help you?"

"Well, I came here looking for my friend, but now I think I'd rather talk to you."

"Mhm. And who's your friend?"

The man shrugs. "Tall, dark hair, immortal, strikingly handsome but not nearly as much as me?"

Lily surpasses a smirk and leans her head back inside. 

"Black! You have a friend at the door!"

"I don't suppose you could invite me in, angel?" the man asks. "You sort of have to give me permission. Vampire hospitality and all that."

She nods a little and invites him inside. He's handsome, she'll give him that, and charming. But he also has the worst pickup lines and exudes arrogance in the way he walks. And, if he's Sirius's friend, that means he's nothing but trouble. 

"This is a nice place," he comments, looking around the living room while Lily glares at him. "What's a nice girl like you doing living with my wanker of a brother?"

Lily narrows her eyes at him. "I thought you said he was your friend." 

"Well obviously we're not blood related. I pride myself very much on not being a product of incest, thank you very much." Lily can't help but snort, and he grins at her. "But he's been my best friend since we were eleven and my parents basically adopted him, so I think he's earned the title."

"That's...actually really sweet."

"I'm fully of surprises, love." he winked at her, and she tried very hard not to blush, grateful when she heard Sirius stomping down the stairs. 

"Prongs! What are you doing here you tosser?" 

Sirius and the man hug and laugh and pat each other's backs. Lily thinks the scene is actually rather cute. She wants to take a picture and hang it up on the fridge, even if Sirius would kill her for it. Remus has his arm wrapped around his friend's shoulder and he squeezes it, smiling a signature Sirius Black smile. 

"Evans, this is my brother, James Potter. James, this is the wonderful Lily Evans."

"Charmed." Lily says with a smirk. The man- James -brushes a hand through his unruly hair and grins at her. 

"Sirius, why didn't you tell me your roommate is a goddess? I would've come to visit you a lot sooner." 

Lily sees and hears the satisfying smack of Sirius's hand connecting with the back of James's head.

"She's too good for you, mate, trust me."

"He's right, I am."

Sirius laughs. Lily decides she likes seeing this side of Sirius. He's happy, of course, but now he seems more...alive. Which of course he's not, but still. He's got this twinkle in his eye that she hasn't seen before. It's like he was missing a little piece of him before, and now that James is here he's complete. It's kind of beautiful, she thinks. Even if this James person is a bit of an arrogant flirt.

She's content to stand there, watching them talk animatedly, James gesticulating wildly with his hands. She's sort of tuned out of the conversation, really. She doesn't realize she's been watching the James's shirt clings to his lean muscles until Remus is walking through the door, done with his shift. 

"Alright, Lily?" 

"Sirius has a friend over." she smiles at him. She swears she can see Remus's expression drop just a little as he sets his bag down.

"Oh." 

She rubs her hand over his arm. "Don't look so grim. He's a bit of a git, really, but he's nice. C'mon."

She pulls him over to the couch where Sirius and James are sitting. She can't help but notice the way Sirius's face lights up when he sees Remus. Lily considers starting a bet with James on when they'll finally get over themselves and kiss already. She'll see how the night plays out first. 

"Moony! You're home! This is my best friend and brother, James." 

Remus looks as if he just let out a breath he's been holding for a while. "Oh. Hello, I'm Remus."

James raises an eyebrow. "Oh, so this is him? Well now I understand why you f--"

Sirius shuts him up with an elbow to the ribs and Lily stifles a laugh behind her hand. She throws herself down on Sirius's lap and revels in the way James's eyeballs look like they're about to pop out of his head. 

"Well boys," she grins. "I fancy a bit of an outing tonight. Care to join us, James?" 

"Evans, for you, I'd walk to the ends of the earth."

"I'll take that as a yes then. Remus?" 

"Oh," he stammers. "Oh, no, I don't think--"

"He's coming," Sirius interrupts. "Right, Remus?" 

"I don't suppose I have much of a choice, do I?"

Lily gets up and plants a kiss to his cheek. "Nope."

James walks with her towards the back of the group heading to the club. Lily's keeping her eyes ahead, focused on the way that Remus and Sirius's hands just barely brushed. It's nice, she thinks, to see their romance blossom. It makes her feel a little less lonely.

"So," James interrupts her thoughts. "what do I have to do to earn a kiss on the cheek?"

Lily takes a moment, pretends she's deep in thought, just to see James squirm. She likes him, of course, but that doesn't mean she's going to make this easy on him.

"Hmm. Get through tonight without making a complete fool out of yourself, and we'll see."

James, of course, does not make it to the end of the night. He's three tequila shots in when he finds the karaoke machine and serenades Lily with Queen's _Somebody to Love._ He makes a complete fool out of himself the entire time, sporting his tie like a headband and playing horrible air guitar. Somehow half of his shirt comes unbuttoned by the time it's over, and he looks like he just stepped out of a glitter factory. Lily notices her eyes lingering on the bit of chest that shows through and hopes the lighting in the club is dim enough where James can't see her blush. 

She lets him drag her to the dance floor after that, and yelps when he picks her up and spins her around. He's completely shit-faced, Lily can tell, and still the picture of arrogance, but something about it is charming. Lily likes that he's a ball of energy. It helps her feel a little more human. 

At the end of the night, Sirius has to practically carry him back to the flat. Lily thinks he looks ridiculous, still covered in glitter and singing a song about a man named Tim Finnegan, who fell off a ladder and broke his skull. Lily thinks it's a bit morbid to have such a happy tune carry such graphic details. It's undeniable that James Potter has made a complete, utter fool out of himself tonight. Lily gives him a kiss on the cheek anyway.


	4. Greyback

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Greyback had been frightening, at first. After the initial shock, Remus realized it should have been obvious. The shabby clothes, the dirt, the unmistakable animal scent. It had all been right in front of him from the start. Greyback didn't blame him- Remus had never met another werewolf before, after all. 

**Remus**

Greyback had been frightening, at first. After the initial shock, Remus realized it should have been obvious. The shabby clothes, the dirt, the unmistakable animal scent. It had all been right in front of him from the start. Greyback didn't blame him- Remus had never met another werewolf before, after all. 

Still a careful man, he had only agreed to go talk with Greyback if they could be somewhere public. He had agreed, and stayed mostly silent during the walk. That's how they ended up at the diner, Remus nursing his coffee as Greyback speaks. He's never hungry after a full moon, even less so now. The smell of bacon grease makes him nauseous.

"What's your greatest fear?" The older werewolf asks him. Remus snaps himself out of his daze and peers over his coffee cup, bleary-eyed.

"Hm?"

"What's your greatest fear, Remus?" he repeats. His voice is low and rough, and something about the authority behind it makes Remus's stomach flip. Probably some kind of wolf-like instinct, left over from last night. 

"Well...the wolf scratching someone, I suppose. Turning them."

Greyback raises an eyebrow. "The wolf is _you_ , Remus. Keeping it separate will only make things harder."

"I don't care," Remus snaps. He looks around the diner, embarrassed, then lowers his voice. "I don't care if it's harder. That _thing_ is not me, it's not who I am. It's just something that happens to me once a month, and the rest of the time I can forget about it." He can feel himself growing flustered, his cheeks hot, brow sweaty. He blames it on the moon.

He doesn't like the knowing look Greyback gives him before speaking.

"You know that's not true, Remus. I know that you can feel your power growing stronger, your senses, your stamina, everything, leading up to the full. I know the day after you feel sick. Even now, I can see the wolf in you."

"It doesn't matter," Remus says, and it feels like he's talking to a brick wall. "all I want to do is manage it, then forget about it."

"Then let me teach you how to manage it."

Remus almost chokes on his coffee. He feels more feverish than ever, now, and Greyback's words are not helping. 

"What?"

Greyback, unfazed, simply picks up a napkin and cleans the coffee off the table. 

"I can make it safer for you. For everyone."

Remus wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and narrows his eyes. "How?"

"You just have to trust me. Let me show you." 

Remus glances at his watch- it's half past noon already, and he doesn't doubt that he has at least five missed calls from Sirius. He fumbles in his pocket for some cash, throws it on the table, and hurries to pull on his jacket. 

"I've got to go."

"Remus--"

"Look, I'll. I'll think about it, okay? I promise."

Greyback only nods at him and Remus does not linger. He hurries out of the diner, practically speed-walks down the street towards the flat. Sirius is waiting for him when he gets home, sitting on the couch, arms folded, with a scowl on his face. His brow is furrowed and makes a crease across his forehead. Remus resists the urge to smooth it out with his thumb. 

"And where have you been, young man?" Sirius asks. Remus knows he's angry, but he can't help but scoff at the dad-like persona Sirius has taken on. 

"Sorry," he fumbles out. He's never been very good at lying. "got lost in the woods."

"Bullshit." He gets up and sets himself right in Remus's space, his face near inches away. Remus is taller, by a few inches, but he feels small under Sirius's keen eyes. He feels his cheeks go hot again, and this time, he doesn't think it's the wolf. "What were you really doing, Moony?"

"Remus?"

He is saved, mercifully by beautiful, wonderful Lily. He releases a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding and steps away from Sirius, points his eyes towards the stairs instead. Lily is bounding down, taking them two at a time, with a bright smile plastered on her face. Remus thinks she looks happier than usual, and her hair and clothes look a bit ruffled. 

"Alright, Lily?" he grins at her, raises an eyebrow at her state of appearance. Lily quickly brushes her hands through her hair and adjusts her clothes. 

"You're home late, aren't you?" she asks. She sounds a little flustered, and Remus smirks at Sirius's completely clueless expression. 

"Got a bit lost in the woods. What have you been up to?"

Lily's cheeks are distinctly pink, and he swears he can hear her gulp. "Nothing! Just, er...homework."

"Homework?" Sirius interjects. Remus receives a look from Lily and decides to let him live in ignorance for a while.

"Yeah, I've been, erm, taking night classes. Thought it might be nice, to get me out of the house, now that people can see me."

Sirius shrugs. Remus wonders how he's survived this long without him, honestly, he's so clueless. 

"Fun. Seen James anywhere?"

"No!" Lily says, a little too eagerly. "Why would- why would you ask me that?"

"I don't know. You're the one who's been home all morning."

"Right, well. I suppose he's having a bit of a lie-in, after last night."

Remus turns to Sirius now. "Last night?"

Sirius rubs the back of his neck, the way he does when he's embarrassed. He cracks a small, nonchalant smile. 

"Well, James and I made a bet, you see, and things got a little...out of hand."

Lily snorts. "What he means is, he and Potter got absolutely pissed last night seeing who could drink the most beer before throwing up."

Remus laughs, a genuine, full laugh. He feels better than he has all morning, and the relief almost has him forgetting about his meeting with Greyback. 

He tries to occupy the rest of the day with constant activity to distract himself. He does the washing up, vacuums the entire flat, cleans out the fridge. He even helps Sirius put a new patch on his leather jacket. He's been in a rather odd mood since seeing Lily, though he seems better now that he's seen James. Remus refuses to take pity on him. He loves Lily, and he loves Sirius being the one out of the loop for once even more so. 

He finds himself in the living room with Lily, sitting on the floor and sorting through old DVDs. She's been unusually silent, knees drawn up to her chest as she hums to herself and focuses diligently on her task.

"So..." Remus starts. "you and James, then?" Lily looks around quickly, as if Sirius may be listening around the corner and leans in towards Remus. 

"You can't tell Sirius, okay?" she whispers. "He'd totally freak out." 

Remus leans in so his head is touching Lily's. "Your secret is safe with me." 

Lily kisses him on the cheek before getting back to work. They fall back into silence, and it makes Remus squirm. Silence means thinking, and thinking means worrying about Greyback.

"For the record," he prods. "I don't think he'd mind. Sirius."

Lily just shakes her head, keeps her eyes on the DVDs. 

"James is adamant. We will tell him eventually, it's just...well, now isn't a great time."

"What'd you mean?"

Lily leans in to whisper again, finally meeting this gaze. "There's something going on, with the vampires. Jame's won't tell me what, but it's why he's here. I think it's something to do with Sirius's family."

Remus's brow creases. Sirius doesn't talk much about his family, but he knows he ran away to the Potter's when he was sixteen. Remus doesn't like to push. He can tell the subject upsets him. 

"Are they...?"

Lily nods solemnly. "One of the oldest families, apparently. Of course, James had no idea and Sirius wasn't supposed to turn at all, but I supposed something happened to change that."

Remus tries not to frown. Really, he shouldn't be upset at all. Sirius has every right to tell or not tell him anything he wants. He doesn't even know how he turned, and it's perfectly fine, because that's Sirius's secret to tell. Still, it doesn't stop the pang he feels in his heart. 

"I'm not the only one keeping secrets about my love life, you know," Lily says suddenly. Remus feels grateful for the sudden change of subject. Lily always knows when he's feeling upset or uncomfortable. 

"How do you mean?"

Lily raises an eyebrow and gives Remus a knowing look. 

"Remus. Come on."

"What?" 

He suddenly feels very sympathetic to how Sirius was feeling earlier. Lily smiles at him and nudges his ribs with her elbow. 

"You and Sirius?" Remus feels his heart stop and his eyes bug out of their sockets. "Don't give me that look. I know you like him."

Remus sputters. "I-I--"

"Please, Remus, I'm dead, not blind. I see the way you two look at each other."

"That doesn't-that doesn't mean anything. Sirius is--"

"Gay as a maypole," Lily smiles. "and completely in love with you."

Remus feels like he's going to vomit. Liking Sirius is private, and definitely not something he wants to discuss with Lily right now, when he could walk in on them in any minute. Besides, he's tried very hard over the past year to accept that he will be hopelessly pining over Sirius forever, and this information throws a bit of a wrench in his plans. 

"You can't tell him."

Lily's eyes widen. "Of course not. Of course not, Remus." She grabs his hand and squeezes it. "But I'm here, okay? If you ever want to talk about it."

Remus smiles, just a little, a secret smile only for Lily, and kisses the top of her head. 

"Come on. Let's get this cleaned up."


	5. Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone has been acting rather strange lately. Remus has been dodgy ever since the last full moon, always looking over his shoulder. Sirius knew something was wrong when he had come home in the morning, but he doesn't know what. Remus says everything is fine, but Sirius knows. He always knows. James has been secretive, always going off to who knows where, saying he's meeting a friend that Sirius doesn't know. He still hasn't said why he's come to Bristol in the first place. And Lily is just...weird. Secretive. It's unlike her. Sirius feels as if everyone he loves is keeping secrets from him, and it's killing him. 

**Sirius**

Everyone has been acting rather strange lately. Remus has been dodgy ever since the last full moon, always looking over his shoulder. Sirius knew something was wrong when he had come home in the morning, but he doesn't know what. Remus says everything is fine, but Sirius knows. He always knows. James has been secretive, always going off to who knows where, saying he's meeting a friend that Sirius doesn't know. He still hasn't said why he's come to Bristol in the first place. And Lily is just...weird. Secretive. It's unlike her. Sirius feels as if everyone he loves is keeping secrets from him, and it's killing him. 

He's not proud of himself, when he finally snaps. It's been building up for weeks now, and Sirius feels like a tea kettle that's been whistling for ages and someone needs to take him off the fucking stove. So, really, no one could blame him when he lets himself into Remus's room and slams the door behind him. 

"Bloody hell, Padfoot!" 

Remus is in his pants and tries hastily to cover himself with his quilt, and Sirius is so angry he can't even be bothered to blush. 

"Spit it out," is all he says, and Remus has the audacity to look like he has no idea what he's talking about. 

"I don't-I don't know what you mean--"

"You're a shit liar, Moony," he scoffs. "you've been hiding something ever since the last full, don't deny it."

Remus closes his mouth and looks down in his lap, and Sirius is annoyed that he feels a little bad. Maybe he should have let loose on James, instead. 

"Look, Moony. You don't have to tell me. You have your secrets, I get it. But I feel like everyone is hiding something from me and it's driving me insane, so please, just tell me _something_."

Remus is keeping his eyes steadily in his lap and Sirius doesn't know if he wants to kiss him or smack him. 

"I met another werewolf," he mumbles after a long pause. 

Shit. Sirius is such a prick. 

"That's...that's great, Moony."

Remus still isn't looking at him. He's started picking at a loose bit of string. 

"He wants to help me manage it. The wolf."

"Are you going to let him?"

"I don't know."

Sirius sighs, mutters a "budge up," and sits himself down next to Remus on the bed. He's blushing again, and Sirius is glad that some things never change. 

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Remus just shakes his head. Sirius wraps an arm around his shoulders and musses up his brown curls, and he sees the ghost of a smile on Remus's lips, and the world is right again. 

"You should talk to James, though," Remus says. "I think he's too scared to be the first one to talk."

Sirius nods, takes a moment to think. "We're alright though, aren't we, Moony?"

Remus's face is bright and happy again, and Sirius's heart feels warm and fuzzy. He thinks it might beat out of his chest when he turns and smiles at him.

"Yeah. Yeah, we're alright."

Remus checked off the list, Sirius feels much more confident about confronting James. He shoots him a text telling him the name of the pub to meet at and when. A neutral, public place would keep them from completely blowing up at each other. Sirius doesn't want to get into a row, but they're both stubborn and he's learned from his past mistakes. 

James is late, as he always is nowadays, and his untidy hair is somehow worse than usual. His glasses are askew on his nose and Sirius's hand twitches at the thought of smacking them off his face. 

"Alright, Pads?" He's grinning like an idiot. Sirius grunts in response and takes a sip from his pint. 

"You're looking rather cheerful," Sirius comments. James pales a bit and fixes his glasses. 

"Yeah, yeah, I just--"

"Enough, Prongs. Tell me what's really been going on."

James sighs. "Do you want the good news or the bad news first?"

Sirius bites his lip and drains his glass. James Potter never has bad news. Even if someone were dying, James would be able to spin it. This must be really bad. 

"Good news first."

James grins. "Evans and I are dating."

Sirius smacks the back of James's head, out of reflex, but he and James are both laughing. 

"You dick! Why didn't you tell me?"

"She's your friend, we didn't know how you'd react and we're taking things slow..."

"James Potter, taking things slow? You must really be in love."

"I think I am, mate." Sirius relishes the dopey grin on his face, claps his hand on his shoulder. 

"I'm happy for you. Really. Of course, you have your differences. She's a pisces, you're a 117 year old mass murderer--"

"Hey!"

"But I think you're perfect for each other."

James blushes and smacks Sirius's arm. "Thanks, mate. Really, it means a lot."

There's a pregnant pause. Both of them take silent sips from their pints, not wanting to break the cozy atmosphere they'd just created. Sirius knows it's better to ask now, rip the plaster off. He clears his throat. 

"What's the bad news, Prongs?"

James gives him this stupid sympathetic look that's typically reserved for one subject and one subject alone. Sirius can feel the bile bubbling up in his throat. 

"It's your family, Padfoot."

Sirius forces his expression to remain neutral. He swallows.

"Right. What have they done this time?"

"Have you ever heard of Tom Riddle?"

Sirius frowns and searches his brain. He vaguely remembers the name from his hours of lessons at home.

"Maybe. What's he got to do with anything?"

"He's building an army. A big one. He's going around calling himself "Lord Voldemort" and everything, talking about the purity of," he lowers his voice. "Of vampires. How humans need to be put in their place. Werewolves, too, wants them all exterminated. It's scary, mate."

Sirius takes a moment to digest. People have tried this before, of course- every couple decades or so someone comes up with the brilliant idea of taking over the human world, and every time it fails. But if it's enough for James to be concerned...

"And my family is on his side, is that it?" 

James nods. Sirius feels his next question weigh heavy on his tongue, and he desperately doesn't want to ask, but he has to.

"And Regulus?"

James doesn't even have to say anything. They both know the answer. Sirius orders two more beers. 

"What do we do, then?"

He sees James's eyes widen, the apprehension on his face. He shouldn't be surprised, honestly. He should know Sirius well enough by now to have guessed what his reaction will be. 

"Sirius--"

"There has to be some kind of opposition, right? That's why you're here, isn't it? To recruit me?" Shame washes over James's face, and for the second time today, Sirius feels like a dick. "I-I didn't mean it like that, Prongs. I'm glad you're here, really."

He looks a little relieved, and Sirius feels the same. 

"I'm in this...group. A club sort of thing. The Order of the Phoenix." Sirius snorts. "I know, bloody pretentious name. But we're doing real work, y'know, to fight. We've got some good people on our side. Shacklebolt, Moody, Dumbledore--"

"Dumbledore?" Sirius has to work at not spitting out his beer. "How old is he now? 2,000?"

"Something like that," James smiles. "Riddle's frightened of him, though, everyone knows."

"How do I start fighting, then?"

James pats his back. "One step at a time, Pads."


	6. A Mattress of Leaves and a Blanket of Stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus agrees to meet Greyback in the woods the day before the next full moon. Sirius wanted to come along, of course, but Remus forbid it. He doesn't want Sirius to see that side of him, never again. Besides, he has enough to worry about as it is. They still haven't spoken about it, but Remus can hear him whispering with James about vampires and wars. 

**Remus**

Remus agrees to meet Greyback in the woods the day before the next full moon. Sirius wanted to come along, of course, but Remus forbid it. He doesn't want Sirius to see that side of him, never again. Besides, he has enough to worry about as it is. They still haven't spoken about it, but Remus can hear him whispering with James about vampires and wars. 

He's glad, to be honest, to get out of the flat for a while. He loves living with Sirius and Lily, and he likes James well enough that he doesn't protest him staying over almost every night. But sometimes Remus just needs his space. Especially now, when he's dealing with all this...wolfy stuff. 

When he arrives at their spot in the forest, Greyback is walking in a circle with a raw chicken on a string. Remus has to push the bile rising in his throat back down. Greyback knows more about wolf stuff than him. He needs to trust that. 

"Remus!" Greyback greets him with an odd, forced smile. "Just in time, I'm setting up for tomorrow."

"With a...chicken?"

Greyback's laugh is harsh, and the sound rings in Remus's ears. His senses are always heightened around this time, but something about the sound of Greyback laughing makes him queasy. 

"It's a little trick I learned. You walk the chicken in a circle a couple times before the full, and then you hide the chicken. You'll follow the smell all night, but it'll just lead you in a circle, so you won't risk hurting anyone."

"So, the wolf--"

"You, Remus. The wolf is you."

"Right, is the-I'll just. Walk around in a circle all night? What if it smells something else?"

"You won't. Trust me."

They spend hours in the forest that day. Remus notices that he feels a kind of tug in his gut around Greyback. It's something he doesn't feel with Sirius or Lily. It's not a feeling of friendship. It's probably something closer to...kinship. His pack. An animal instinct. For once, Remus doesn't try and fight it. 

At the end, Remus ends up inviting Greyback back to the house with him, just for some tea. It's the naturally polite thing to do, but that pull in Remus's belly strengthens it. So he does.

Lily is welcoming as ever, and immediately jumps up to make them both some tea. James maintains a polite distance, his nose wrinkled beneath his glasses. Remus supposes it's the smell, but then again Greyback has been openly flirting with Lily since he arrived. Sirius is obviously skeptical, and it dampens Remus's spirits. He really wants Sirius to like Greyback, for whatever reason.

"I've been hitching around the south for a while," Greyback says animatedly over his tea. "sleeping rough, transforming in the countryside. A couple of months ago, I found these clothes in the forest, all folded neatly, and I think 'that's odd.' It was the day after the full moon, so my senses were still pretty sharp, and there's no mistaking that scent."

He slips Remus a wolfish grin, and Sirius frowns. 

"I spent the next couple of weeks at the library, looking over the local newspaper websites."

"What were you looking for?" Lily interrupts. She looks positively captivated, and Remus thinks that James is just about ready to explode. 

Greyback winks at her. "Animal attacks, wolf attacks, anything like that. I was about to give up, but then there it was- Scotland, 'Stirling Gazette,' 2018. 'Tourist Attacked by Wolf.' So then I had a name, and pretty good sense of the place he was using to transform, so it was just a case of biding my time."

Lily leans in a little, and Remus can swear he sees Sirius put a hand on James's shoulder. 

"So you've been sleeping rough?" she asks. Greyback gives a modest shrug.

"Well, now and again, someone will offer me a bed, but that usually means sharing." he winks again. Remus wants to vomit. "The Earth is my pillow, my canopy is the stars."

"I'd like to see Remus living like that," Sirius snorts. Greyback regards him with cruel, calculating eyes, before turning his gaze back to Lily and Remus. 

"The freedom's addictive. But it can be hard, sometimes. And what you've got here- you know this. Sanctuary. I dunno. Sometimes I'm my own worst enemy, I think." He catches James's eye, only briefly, with a sort of challenging look on his face before he regards Lily once again. "I don't mean to stare, but I've seen people like you before, people who have passed over. But you, you're so solid, so vibrant. You're more like an angel, not a ghost."

That seems to be it for James, but luckily Sirius is quick on his feet. Before he can make a move, Sirius grabs him by the arm and hauls him outside, slamming the door behind them. Lily seems completely oblivious, smiling as ever. 

"Where are you sleeping tonight?"

"In the arms of Mother Nature, as always."

"Oh, no that won't do, it's freezing outside! You should stay with us. Right, Remus?"

Remus, who had frankly zoned out of the conversation for a bit, trying to strain his ears to listen in on James and Sirius, just nods. Lily's scary when you disagree with her. 

"Mhm. Yeah, totally."

"Oh, I wouldn't want to impose--"

"Nonsense, it's only for a couple of days. The best we can offer is the couch, but it's warm and we have a telly."

Greyback cracks that strange smile again, and takes LIly's hand and kisses it. 

"Bless you, love."

After Remus realizes what he's actually agreed to, that pull in his chest turns into an anxiety stomach ache. He excuses himself for a moment and pulls Lily with him into the kitchen. 

"Lily," he whispers. "what the fuck did I just agree to?"

"Remus, were you really not paying attention? Honestly, you boys..."

"Lily," he repeats. He grabs both her forearms and leans in. "he can't stay here." Lily just swats his arm playfully. 

"Don't be silly, of course he can. I don't understand why you're acting like this."

Remus feels rage bubble up in his throat- he's prone to this, when it's this close to the full. He tries hard to contain it, but it just comes out as a whisper-scream while he pulls his hair. 

"You don't get it! The house is my way of coping, okay? It's how I keep things separate."

Lily crosses her arms over her chest. "No offense, Remus, but you get to keep things separate 28 days out of 29. That's pretty good. Sirius, James, and I can't do that."

Remus, completely fed up with the topic, leaves her silently and goes outside to join the other two. They're in a heated argument, but stop when they see him approach. James looks like he's going absolutely mental, and Sirius is holding him back by one of his arms.

"That _thing_ ," James points towards the door. "needs to go, Moony."

Remus bristles. He wasn't thrilled about Greyback staying with them either just moments before, but now he's defensive. Greyback isn't entirely pleasant, but he's still mostly human. And more importantly, there's that animal instinct, telling Remus that Greyback is in his pack, and James is challenging him. He can either bow down or fight. He chooses to fight.

"That thing," he says, fists balled at his side, staring daggers at James, spitting venom with every word. "is the same as I am." He can feel that bubbling again, the rage the moon brings that wants to break free. The wolf in him wants to tackle James, scratch him, show his dominance. 

James roles his eyes cruelly. "Oh come _on_ , Remus. You know the two of you aren't the same."

"Padfoot," he hears Sirius warn. Remus barely registers it, he's seeing red. He can smell James's blood. 

"No!" James shoves him off. "You've seen him! He's a- he's a monster!"

The rage cools down, and now all Remus can feel is the ice cold stare he's giving James. He says his next words calmly, evenly. 

"Then what does that make me?"

James sputters. It gives Remus a kind of smug satisfaction, seeing him struggle to justify his words. Sirius, though, has clearly had enough, because he steps between the two and glares at the both of them.

"Enough," he says. "Remus, Greyback is your friend, you get to decide if he stays or goes."

Out of stubbornness and instinct, Remus folds his arms across his chest and says, "He stays."

"Fine. Go home, James."

"Absolutely not! I'm not leaving Lily alone in that house with _him_."

"Then get your shit together."

With that, Sirius goes back into the house, slamming the door behind him, leaving Remus and James alone in the alley.


End file.
